All panda sex involves rape. Panda's have the worst sexual appetite of all living creatures except for coral. Coral does not have sex, but once in a month or year they just ejaculate everything they have right into the ocean. Eggs, seamen, everything. And it fills the ocean up too! The biggest fish in the world, a whale shark, swims thousands of miles just to get a facial during this time. It's as disgusting as it sounds. Almost like a fat cross-eyed gay guy trying to talk shit about people. Apparently both think it's necessary to do that, just dont be surprised when it hits you back. In the whale shark case it's a form of coral STD on their lip. In the case of the gay guy it's some smack talk on some guys blog. Oh and I'll probably make some comments behind your back and in your face too.
Im getting off track here and I'll continue the story. All panda sex involves rape. They only feel like having intercourse once in a year and it is almost statistically impossible for those days to fall on the same day as their partner. Either the female or the male doesnt want it and thus has to be raped. Convinced. Drugged.
Now that I got your attention I'd like to introduce a new day for everyone. We all know about birthday's, mother's day and so on. They all celebrate something and usually they are the better days in your life. Well I think we're missing one. Happy Boobday. It's primarily for guys when you celebrate the fact you saw some live boobs, but for the girls that are happy to see them too, none of us guys would mind if you used this term as well.
Just imagine this scenario when your friend just got lucky but we dont have anything proper to say. It's usually along the lines of: "oh cool" because you dont want to sound too excited. Now you can just say "Happy boobday". Nothing weird or anything, just the same as congratulations with your birthday.
Plus boobs should be celebrated. You know they should.
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